Back to school anger

There you are enjoying your summer of sunburns, splinters, spider bites and then the back to school circular shows up. Your parents were so happy to show it to you just to let you know the end is nigh.

The best part of back to school was getting a brand new trapper keeper to put your doodles in because the teacher was uninteresting. The worst part was showing up with your new clothes and sneakers only to be mocked for having last years models of Swede Pumas. How did seventh graders know this? I was happy to have name brands!

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Slides vs Flip flops

I understand flip flops. What I don’t understand is the slides and socks configuration. The point of flip flops is they’re easy on/off and keep your feet cool. Slides are easy on/off and keep your feet cool, but socks keep your feet warm. Slides and socks may be comfortable but it my opinion it’s a sign of giving up. You made the effort of putting on socks but didn’t commit to go full shoe. It’s like when people put on house shoes and smash down the heels. It’s just plain lazy.

I do not wear slides or flip flops out in public under any circumstance. My argument is simple. They are terrible for your feet, if you think about it they are not secure on your foot at all, so your subconscious mind has to make the foot work extra to keep them on. This will put stress on your tendons and ligaments. Plus, you can’t run away from pit bulls. If there is shattered glass in your path while the pit bull is chasing you, the bloody footprints will allow the dog to track you if you manage to hide from him.

Finally, if you must expose your feet to the public, please consider something with a heel strap. Also, clean up your feet and toenails for goodness sake.